yesterday i wrote around 5000 words, so my nano stats look like this. now i'm aiming to reach 30000 words because i don't have time to write tomorrow. you have still time to post ideas in case you want. i'll let you enjoy the chapter. this is also the last chapter i've written before nano began, so you might spot the nanowrimo 'clumsiness' in the following chapters:::D listening to snow patrol, here's chapter 14.
Chapter Fourteen
“I can see what you are thinking,” Severina smiled. “What is your role in this. And why, of all people, did I choose you.”
She stood up in a whirlwind, pulling out a thick book almost out of nowhere. The figure on the cover was a recognizable hexagon.
“This is the history of the council,” she said. “It has existed since the very beginning. Since then the members have been chosen on the account of how well they represented their element, how willing they were to the duty. Don’t you think it’s what Aurora would have done too?”
I squinted my eyes questioningly as I rocked back on my chair.
I squinted my eyes questioningly as I rocked back on my chair.
“Let me express it differently. There are people who give off very strong draws: draws so strong they are not felt but known, as if they were meant to be. And when one runs into a person like that they know.”
I used the pause to visualize her words: draws radiating off the skin like they were giving off a certain light, a reflection of the soul. Like beauty – there were people who were beautiful from both the outside and inside, so beautiful they had to reduce it. Rotten on the outside, their souls were mistaken being it too. It also implied the opposite way. Something rotten could be so easily mistaken as beautiful.
“You are wind inside out,” Severina told, and I imagined strands of her white hair dancing in a breeze, how wonderful they would look. “That is how Aurora described you. To hide you so you could be mistaken as someone else I had to make you pretend you were something else. I chose the element closest to me to keep you safe. I feel it is right.”
“And so long you are part of the council of darkness you will be safe,” Eua summarized, his stormy eyes looking tired. I wondered how he and Severina had managed all this. How long had they known?
Truth poured down me, I was again in a state of mild shock. I noticed my eyes had gone blank: I wasn’t staring at a particular spot, only resting my eyes. I felt like I had done at the therapist I had visited thrice after my mamma’s death. He had been asking thousands of questions, but they were all meaningless, only flocks of words swimming past like little fish. “You don’t have to say anything,” was what he had told me. Though Eua said nothing unlike my therapist, I knew his eyes spoke the words. The pain will go away. You will grow used to it.
I had never truly understood what he had meant: me forgetting my pain or the memory of my mamma. But they had all blended together, and seeing Severina and Eua on the other side of the table like I was in the middle of an interrogation broke my mind. I let out a helpless yelp, and as realization crashed my mind’s color turned from blue to red through purple, a fear mixed with hate.
I was doomed! I could never truly be a wind councelor – I could never show my affection to Aurora in public: or most probably, never show myself in public. I would be a part of the council of darkness, the council of wrong, but only a figurehead in the background. I had never grown used to being a wallflower. I had always attention, but never the positive. Everyone knew my name, and they spoke it with revolt.
Before Severina and Eua left me sitting alone in the room, Severina’s calming voice rang through my ears. “It’s not how you see it,” she almost whispered. “It’s none like it.”
The covers of the council book slammed shut in concord with the door. My ears buzzed and the edges of my vision were covered with dancing white spots like I was lacking blood to the head. Without conscious thought I stood up so fast all was white. The library was a round, somber room with cases of dark, ashy wood, onyx walls and a mirror-like floor. It reflected the face of a stranger – golden hair and eyes whipping in a sudden breeze I knew was caused by my emotion. It felt wrong: I felt the air around me resist and turn into haze: darkness was withstanding. A coldness crept inside me, and I turned around in a swift movement, facing the barred window like one of a prison cells. I wanted to bend the bars and break my way out, run far away and fall endlessly asleep. I imagined tears of anger, but my eyes were dry. Unable to stay by my place, I paced all around, flashes of life running over my eyes. It was as if I was suddenly trying to find a reason – someone else to blame than myself, dig deep into my past and find even the tiniest signs that would have hinted towards this: signs I could have followed to prevent turning the wrong way. What if I had been someone else? What if my heart hadn’t started racing as I watched Ashley bare herself to me, what if I wouldn’t have followed her – what if I had chosen a different seat in English class than next to Tessie who passed the pink post-it slip to me, what if I had slept over the day or never moved into my own house, lived together with my mamma until time ends?
The covers of the council book slammed shut in concord with the door. My ears buzzed and the edges of my vision were covered with dancing white spots like I was lacking blood to the head. Without conscious thought I stood up so fast all was white. The library was a round, somber room with cases of dark, ashy wood, onyx walls and a mirror-like floor. It reflected the face of a stranger – golden hair and eyes whipping in a sudden breeze I knew was caused by my emotion. It felt wrong: I felt the air around me resist and turn into haze: darkness was withstanding. A coldness crept inside me, and I turned around in a swift movement, facing the barred window like one of a prison cells. I wanted to bend the bars and break my way out, run far away and fall endlessly asleep. I imagined tears of anger, but my eyes were dry. Unable to stay by my place, I paced all around, flashes of life running over my eyes. It was as if I was suddenly trying to find a reason – someone else to blame than myself, dig deep into my past and find even the tiniest signs that would have hinted towards this: signs I could have followed to prevent turning the wrong way. What if I had been someone else? What if my heart hadn’t started racing as I watched Ashley bare herself to me, what if I wouldn’t have followed her – what if I had chosen a different seat in English class than next to Tessie who passed the pink post-it slip to me, what if I had slept over the day or never moved into my own house, lived together with my mamma until time ends?
Or if my mamma hadn’t been depressed: was it because of me? She would have been joyful like her name and we would have had a family.
The house I grew up in used to be large and cold with its stone corridors and crystallize windows. It was a house my mamma loved for some unknown reason. She used to sit for hours and hours on the balcony and look down the city like it was part of her. And sometimes when we ate supper in the garden and the sun glinted in my hair she looked at me like I had been there always; like she saw beyond the puny years I had lived on the Earth. She had loved me even before I was born: yet the sight of me made her helplessly sad.
The last what if hovered in my mind like a string to pull; a string to hold to and tie onto another one. I could never return to the past the way it was and decide different. It would be more than my decision to change the path of life; one moment was more than the blink of the eye; in that moment happened an innumerous amount of things.
A single moment I faced my own reflection with a loathing mixed with fear. The closed door stood between two cases, one of which Eua had returned the council history book into. Fluttered from between the pages there was a note. It was a ripped-off page, covered with scrambled handwriting of innumerous curls. I had never seen Severina write, but it had to be hers: the tight curls like tendrils and commas and dashes like tiny teardrops. Before I left the room I stopped to pick it up, reading it over and over again, without understanding.
KEINE VOGEL OHNE FLÜGEL FLIEGT
WIE LIEBE OHNE GLEICHGEWICHT.
But sooner than I could say the words, Severina came storming back into the room.
Our eyes met for a time which was infinity, and I shook my head in awe. “Where… where did you get this?”
She couldn’t read the words from there, but her expression told me she knew.
She couldn’t read the words from there, but her expression told me she knew.
“I-“ she spoke in a daze, caught off guard, in a way I had never seen her before. “Hilary-“
“Hilary!”
The voice which chimed in was thick and passionate, a voice which made my knees give way. “Talia?”
Her hair was wild as a lion’s mane, cheeks glowing like a pair of cherries. Her eyes went from my hands to eyes and Severina and she blushed even more, blowing out an exhausted rush of air.
Her hair was wild as a lion’s mane, cheeks glowing like a pair of cherries. Her eyes went from my hands to eyes and Severina and she blushed even more, blowing out an exhausted rush of air.
“I’m so sorry! Something’s happened.”
I was breathless as I mouthed the word. “What?”
I was breathless as I mouthed the word. “What?”
“It’s a boy at The Cities. It’s just like what happened with me… He’s forgotten who he is.”
The flow of traffic was a mere blur of color as we warped into The Cities. Chyse and Rilla where there waiting for us, and to my surprise, holding hands. Yet the whole world was a blur then: all I could see was Severina’s bewildered look, her forgiving eyes.
A circle of youngsters were bended over at the stairs of The Archives. The building gave me shudders. I still thought I could hear Rilla screaming inside my head.
“He has amnesia,” Circus raised her gaze, her cyan irises crossing mine. They had darkened, as if she had drained her strength. I approached the boy with caution. He lay on the pavement his hands crossed over his chest, a fountain of dusky hair over his eyes. I couldn’t help comparing him into an angel fallen of the sky. I wondered if he had a dark pair of wings…
As I fell on my knees next to him, he flinched, as if I had sent an electric shock through him. The hair fell off his face, revealing me his eyes. They reflected the sun like mirrors leaving me gasping, my mouth hanging like an open trap.
“Hilary?” Talia’s voice was distant. “Is all well? You don’t look real good.”
I shook myself out of the moment. My ears popped as if I had finished a dive, and I faced Rilla’s troubled expression, forcing a smile on my face. It moved no other part than my lips. “I’m okay. How did you find him?”
Nolan looked disturbed and I knew why – I was talking of this stranger like he wasn’t really there. “We were at a restaurant nearby, when Chyse sensed a strong tip. We hurried here instantly.”
Chyse gave us a turned-down smile, letting go of Rilla’s hand. “I’ve been practicing. I can sense tips in balance now.”
“That’s impressive,” I mentioned, but my heart wasn’t in it. “But why did you need me? I was-“
I shook myself out of the moment. My ears popped as if I had finished a dive, and I faced Rilla’s troubled expression, forcing a smile on my face. It moved no other part than my lips. “I’m okay. How did you find him?”
Nolan looked disturbed and I knew why – I was talking of this stranger like he wasn’t really there. “We were at a restaurant nearby, when Chyse sensed a strong tip. We hurried here instantly.”
Chyse gave us a turned-down smile, letting go of Rilla’s hand. “I’ve been practicing. I can sense tips in balance now.”
“That’s impressive,” I mentioned, but my heart wasn’t in it. “But why did you need me? I was-“
The alien boy shuddered as of cold, coughing, reminding me of my first moments in Kaiya. Nolan bent instantly over him, lapsing into doctor Fire-mode. He took hold of the boy’s shoulders like he had done with Talia and Circus at The Archives, and the color on his face recovered. From the gaps of his badly buttoned shirt I could notice scars and bruises, like I was watching a wounded male version of myself. I turned my head away in an unwilling disgust.
“We thought you could be of advice,” Circus spoke. “We have representatives of nearly every element here: fire, water, darkness. We only needed you.”
A boulder dropped inside my stomach, a heavy feeling of nausea flushing over me. “How do-“
“You were the darkness girl with a draw of wind,” Chyse said. The paleness faded off my face, replaced with relief. “The more elements here the better. We may find out who he is. I certainly do know he is not a fire child.”
“He doesn’t know his element?” I asked, still shocked by the thought I would have been revealed. “Where’s his guardian?”
“My name is Fera,” the boy spoke.
“You were the darkness girl with a draw of wind,” Chyse said. The paleness faded off my face, replaced with relief. “The more elements here the better. We may find out who he is. I certainly do know he is not a fire child.”
“He doesn’t know his element?” I asked, still shocked by the thought I would have been revealed. “Where’s his guardian?”
“My name is Fera,” the boy spoke.
My head turned into his direction with a snap. His tone was blank but not cold – only… empty, as if there really was something missing. I repeated his name raptly. “Fera… is that what you’re called?”
“He cannot remember anything else,” Circus complemented. “There are no signs on him that would tell if he has been here longer than this. He either has just arrived from Earth or been here for a longer time. But there is no way we can tell.”
“Can’t we try to awake his instincts?” Rilla asked, her red hair covering her face like a veil. “Evoking the elements could-“
“No,” Circus denied sharply. “In case he has just arrived from Earth it will only confuse him. But this is strange, very, that his guardian hasn’t found him yet.”
I rose my gaze, the gates of my school staring down at me like mocking gargoyles. “It’s this place,” I exhaled, touching Fera’s shoulder. His skin was as cold as he was dead. “We need to get him out of here.”
For my surprise, I received accepting nods of appreciation. Nolan lifted Fera into his arms – gently for such a burly guy – and he lay limp as we carried him to Hotel Aqua. The fountains were off that day. Nolan lay Fera on one of the benches – the same one I and Rilla had sat on and traveled into her past. His eyes were distant and the color of quicksilver, their light faint as a faraway stars. His breath was shallow and I saw his chest rising and falling as the blood slowly returned in his limbs. Circus looked aware as Fera took a deep breath and settled himself into a sitting position, as if she were there to keep him still. Fera looked around drowsily, and as his gaze quit it’s wander, his eyes rested straight on mine.
“He cannot remember anything else,” Circus complemented. “There are no signs on him that would tell if he has been here longer than this. He either has just arrived from Earth or been here for a longer time. But there is no way we can tell.”
“Can’t we try to awake his instincts?” Rilla asked, her red hair covering her face like a veil. “Evoking the elements could-“
“No,” Circus denied sharply. “In case he has just arrived from Earth it will only confuse him. But this is strange, very, that his guardian hasn’t found him yet.”
I rose my gaze, the gates of my school staring down at me like mocking gargoyles. “It’s this place,” I exhaled, touching Fera’s shoulder. His skin was as cold as he was dead. “We need to get him out of here.”
For my surprise, I received accepting nods of appreciation. Nolan lifted Fera into his arms – gently for such a burly guy – and he lay limp as we carried him to Hotel Aqua. The fountains were off that day. Nolan lay Fera on one of the benches – the same one I and Rilla had sat on and traveled into her past. His eyes were distant and the color of quicksilver, their light faint as a faraway stars. His breath was shallow and I saw his chest rising and falling as the blood slowly returned in his limbs. Circus looked aware as Fera took a deep breath and settled himself into a sitting position, as if she were there to keep him still. Fera looked around drowsily, and as his gaze quit it’s wander, his eyes rested straight on mine.
“What is this place?”
I could tell from Talia’s expression the situation gouged her within: it brought back all the memories she had from her first moments in the realm. As she spoke her words, I couldn’t help wondering if they were the same Severina had told her when she first opened her eyes under a new sky.
I could tell from Talia’s expression the situation gouged her within: it brought back all the memories she had from her first moments in the realm. As she spoke her words, I couldn’t help wondering if they were the same Severina had told her when she first opened her eyes under a new sky.
“Kaiya,” Fera repeated with a perfect pronunciation, never leaving his eyes off me. With a blink his silver eyes reflected the image of me, like from some previous life.
“I think I know you somewhere…”
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