today i've written 2716 words and made a page count: i'd have around 241 pages of text on A5-sized paper. i've listened to snow patrol, christina perri, even party anthems like lmfao and david guetta and still my writing has been sort of stiff. i think i'm just afraid that now that the story is coming to an end i won't say all i'd have to or i'll say too much, or that the characters and events are uncatchable. it's hard to say this myself because i know all the time what's going on in the background. now my 8 readers, a mission for you: point out the unclarities and tell me! i learn from my mistakes, after all. it's also possible to ask different types of questions examp. what's in the background :)
kurkistus lukuun 21 (sneak-a-peek into chapter 21)
"You should see your expression. For the sake of the Elementals, I'm a guy who collects dead animals and dangerous weapons. What's so strange in a pineapple?"
Chapter Twelve
If my mind were a computer, instead of a new file there’d be a completely new hard disk for Kaiya. Everything was rearranging, relentlessly changing. I tried arranging chronologically, then according to person, according to feeling. But it all was just a scramble of letters, numbers – pictures and names.
Inside my mind I tried to build a world. I could still see my old city, bright and burning, like imprinted into my mind. But everything was different. The Cities wasn’t only my memory. It was a living metropolis, just as vivid as I.
I couldn’t see how the Guardian palaces were located. I imagined different scenarios, but if they didn’t exist, what was the point? Kaiya wasn’t about thinking, it was about feeling. It was magic instead of technology. Yet every time I mentioned the word ‘magic’, it was replaced by energy, as if everything was part of a greater system, controlled by greater forces, not in the hands of human kind.
It was like I wasn’t supposed to think. Everything was so restricted, determined.
I rolled in my bed in Severina’s palace. My sleep was disturbed by the beat of my own heart, following me inside my dreams. My emotions worked normally, but it was impossible to shrug away the single feeling which weighed me down like I was holding the world in my hands.
Who could I tell? What could I do? I knew nothing of this world. I was suddenly made a councelor, someone who should take care of the balance of two worlds. But if I couldn’t even keep up my own balance, how could it be done?
Aurora had become a distant figure in my past, a memory. I tossed and turned, squeezing my eyes tightly shut, trying to remember. I still saw her as she was when I woke up – shiny, ashy hair, azure eyes of the sky. She would have taught me everything of my element. For now I only knew I was bound with certain abilities: connection to airbeings, some sort of foresight which I had proven only once, and windbending. But I was taken away from her, lead to Severina who claimed to mentor me, but taught me little things only every now and then. It had been maybe a week.
Aurora had become a distant figure in my past, a memory. I tossed and turned, squeezing my eyes tightly shut, trying to remember. I still saw her as she was when I woke up – shiny, ashy hair, azure eyes of the sky. She would have taught me everything of my element. For now I only knew I was bound with certain abilities: connection to airbeings, some sort of foresight which I had proven only once, and windbending. But I was taken away from her, lead to Severina who claimed to mentor me, but taught me little things only every now and then. It had been maybe a week.
I visited The Cities once after Rilla’s incident. It was together with Talia. She took me to some restaurant and kept on waffling about “real good” Kaiyan cuisine and ordered me an earth-cake, something which tasted exactly like dirt. She paid the food with some kind of tokens; ‘elemental tokens’, which Rilla told were valuable – some sort of currency of the guardians and councelors, I think.
And what bothered me the most was the structure of the council. I had met only half of the guardians and yet didn’t know what counceling was. I couldn’t help being bothered by how the guardians and councelors were treated: like they were somehow better. It wasn’t that straight, but yes – if one used their councelor dress on town, they were looked upon with an unreadable combination of respect and fear.
Whatever was the point of this sick game, I didn’t know. I had been building a house of cards inside my mind, something fragile, temporal. It was perfectly easy to topple down.
I had nearly caught sleep when my window flew open with a sudden wind.
I threw my feet off the edge of my bed instantly. The ocean air electrified my senses, opening my eyes like I had dived into icy water. Our doors were locked for night, so I couldn’t get out unless I’d call Severina – which I really didn’t want to do. The night was only haze, a thick pudding of blue and gray. I pushed my head outside, hanging from the window the way I had done as a kid. The wind soothed my skin, letting me close my eyes and relax. It was a surreal feeling, like I could just stand up, let go, take flight…
A shock passed through me and I froze. My hands clutched the shutters with a firm grip.
The wind.
As far as I could remember, the last time I had truly felt wind was on Aurora’s bluff. I had summoned it a few times, unconsciously, not really noticing it happen. Summoned wind differed from what I was feeling now. Wind, without control was free, boundless.
“Hilary,” someone called.
I turned instantly around, maybe expecting for Talia or even Severina, but no-one was there. I must have been imagining things. But as I returned to the window, breathing in the fresh air, I heard it again.
“Listen to me, Hilary.”
This time I could recognize her. My old words for her echoed in my head. Are you my conscience?
“In one way or another, I am,” Aurora responded.
“Oh please,” I sighed, noticing I was talking out loud with a voice inside my head. “It’s one of your puny riddles again! Stop messing with my mind!”
“But I am not,” she sung, her voice like music of the wind.
“But I am not,” she sung, her voice like music of the wind.
That moment I knew she was all around me: the air I breathed, caressing my cheeks. Only I could hear her.
“As I have taught you,” the breeze fluttered joyfully in the flowing curtains, “Wind is very universal.”
Very universal indeed. So universal it could reach my mind.
“As I have taught you,” the breeze fluttered joyfully in the flowing curtains, “Wind is very universal.”
Very universal indeed. So universal it could reach my mind.
“Does Kaiya have mobile phones?” I mouthed, the first thing that came to my mind. It was silence, and I remembered Aurora was from such an era she hadn’t most probably ever seen or heard of one, “Uhm – contact devices?”
Aurora’s tone was gentle yet upright. “We don’t need such things. As you are experiencing, all can be done easier.”
“This wind chat-thing doesn’t have a video-feature, does it?” I smirked at the image. “Because in case you have something really important, I suggest we’d talk face to face. I don’t want anyone to think I’m talking to myself.”
“But you aren’t, are you?” There was a pause. The palace was sound asleep – I, Severina, Talia. Only Darkness was listening, a quiet force all around us; the night. Aurora’s sigh reminded me of a dying breeze. “Are you strong enough to call on wind again?”
Aurora’s tone was gentle yet upright. “We don’t need such things. As you are experiencing, all can be done easier.”
“This wind chat-thing doesn’t have a video-feature, does it?” I smirked at the image. “Because in case you have something really important, I suggest we’d talk face to face. I don’t want anyone to think I’m talking to myself.”
“But you aren’t, are you?” There was a pause. The palace was sound asleep – I, Severina, Talia. Only Darkness was listening, a quiet force all around us; the night. Aurora’s sigh reminded me of a dying breeze. “Are you strong enough to call on wind again?”
I still thought of the time with Severina at the council – but it hadn’t happened ever since. Almost like warping inside the building was harder only because it was such a sacred place.
“You taught I should always keep on trying,” I reminded Aurora, thinking of the day I first heard those words. It was such long ago, like another life…
“Did I?”
As I leered around at the empty, starless beach, I stood up on the windowsill, imagining Aurora’s celestial eyes like a serene sky. In a time briefer than a second I was already there, with no trace of nausea at all.
As I leered around at the empty, starless beach, I stood up on the windowsill, imagining Aurora’s celestial eyes like a serene sky. In a time briefer than a second I was already there, with no trace of nausea at all.
“You speak your mind out loud,” Aurora voiced.
I recognized the hummock of grass I had landed on. It was the very same I had slept my first night on. This time the sky wasn’t as bright. It had drained its reds, replaced them with a dull midnight blue and faded starlight. The whole world was in a slumber, like a waking dream. Aurora’s figure shimmered and flickered in the night like a mirage. With a closer look I saw the familiar spirits – faceless bodies of human, circling her like the stars over Earth.
“You see them, don’t you?” Aurora’s tone was rhetorical, thoughtful. “Please, sit with us.”
I landed on my back on among the familiar strands, sighing with content. The trees had started to alter in color, the air taste bitter. I wore only my guardian dress: transparent, black silk flowing all around me. But I knew no cold.
I landed on my back on among the familiar strands, sighing with content. The trees had started to alter in color, the air taste bitter. I wore only my guardian dress: transparent, black silk flowing all around me. But I knew no cold.
“You can have your clothes with you, if you wish,” Aurora mentioned. “I still have them in my palace.”
I had almost forgotten she hadn’t thrown them all away. I had forgotten them all with her, even my mamma’s scarf I wouldn’t give up from any price. I had too much to think about. Too much to distract me from everything familiar, lead me in an alien world along with a new me.
I had almost forgotten she hadn’t thrown them all away. I had forgotten them all with her, even my mamma’s scarf I wouldn’t give up from any price. I had too much to think about. Too much to distract me from everything familiar, lead me in an alien world along with a new me.
“Later,” I said. “Let’s get a few things straight first. Why did you leave me?”
I could hear from Aurora’s tone she was sorry, but there was something else. “But I never did,” she answered, just like she had done before.
“That isn’t enough! Since I left you it’s been so confusing I’ve lost myself. Severina… I really like her. I believe she is a good guardian. To Talia. But she’s not my guardian. She can’t teach me the way you do.”
Aurora cast me a turned-down smile, resting her hands on my own. She had been doing it for long without me noticing, like it was the natural thing to do. “She cannot teach you the ways of air, but neither can I. Becoming one with your element is growth of your own. I cannot live through you. It would be like a mother trying to be her child, failed in living a dream of her own.”
I could hear from Aurora’s tone she was sorry, but there was something else. “But I never did,” she answered, just like she had done before.
“That isn’t enough! Since I left you it’s been so confusing I’ve lost myself. Severina… I really like her. I believe she is a good guardian. To Talia. But she’s not my guardian. She can’t teach me the way you do.”
Aurora cast me a turned-down smile, resting her hands on my own. She had been doing it for long without me noticing, like it was the natural thing to do. “She cannot teach you the ways of air, but neither can I. Becoming one with your element is growth of your own. I cannot live through you. It would be like a mother trying to be her child, failed in living a dream of her own.”
“But a mother is always there,” I insisted, blinking back the upcoming tears. I knew I would cry that night. I felt it coming like a rain after the dry season. “It’s her duty. Just like it’s my duty to grow, it’s hers to watch me grow and learn, tell me when I’m wrong and lead me the right way. I can’t survive it all on my own. Severina can only be a replacement, and she’ll never do as you do.”
There were things I left out by purpose, only to prevent the dams of my tears from breaking and rushing free. Like how being a mother was also of pride. My mamma hadn’t lived long enough to experience what I would accomplish in my life. Until that moment I had only failed in comforting her and moved away from home to run from what I should have been. My mamma didn’t have the strength to be a mother – to look upon me with joy and pride and smile at what I had become. It was almost as if I had to play her part instead.
There were things I left out by purpose, only to prevent the dams of my tears from breaking and rushing free. Like how being a mother was also of pride. My mamma hadn’t lived long enough to experience what I would accomplish in my life. Until that moment I had only failed in comforting her and moved away from home to run from what I should have been. My mamma didn’t have the strength to be a mother – to look upon me with joy and pride and smile at what I had become. It was almost as if I had to play her part instead.
Aurora’s sigh was heavy and internal. There was expectation in her eyes. “Severina has done the right thing,” she whispered under her breath. “It is good for now.”
“What’s good? To keep me ignorant and simultaneously expect me to act as a councelor? You don’t know how-“
Aurora raised her index finger with a shush. “Yes, Hilary, I do know. But it’s not time yet.”
Aurora raised her index finger with a shush. “Yes, Hilary, I do know. But it’s not time yet.”
A raven cried in the dead of night. “How come it isn’t? What are you two keeping from me?”
“That, Hilary dear, you have to experience yourself.”
My ignorance was killing me. Anticipation filled my insides like a huge balloon, waiting to pop. Scenarios ran through my head. What was this secrecy all about? Did it have to do with my visions, the Elements… or was it what I had expected? Kaiya changing into something new, something different?
Kaiya changing slowly into how I knew Earth…
I shook my head and dug my fingers in my thighs. My fingernails had grown long, each leaving behind a red mark of their own. Was it all how I expected?
Aurora’s expression told it even before she spoke the words.
Aurora’s expression told it even before she spoke the words.
“It all has gone wrong,” she breathed hastily. “Terribly wrong.”
As if her words were a bad omen, a bright flash erupted from the darkness, illuminating the world. Lightning scattered all over the foggy sky, accompanied by a rumbling thunder in the distance. The hairs on my skin stood up, and the glassy walls of Aurora’s palace reflected me as a child who had stuck her fingers in a socket.
“Does it thunder often in Kaiya?”
“The elements are restless these days. Even fire and wind have turned against each other.”
“The elements are restless these days. Even fire and wind have turned against each other.”
The electrified air around us smelt of corrosion, the rain hitting the cliffs in distance sounded like falling stars.
“It never reaches here,” she carried on. “This is a sacred place of the wind. No other element touches this place.”
I patted the hummock under me with curious eyes. Aurora fixed hers on the willow above me, its minty leaves drooping over us like eathern tendrils. “The Earth is inevitable for all life, just like wind forms the air we breathe. It only comes a menace when it becomes too aggressive.”
I patted the hummock under me with curious eyes. Aurora fixed hers on the willow above me, its minty leaves drooping over us like eathern tendrils. “The Earth is inevitable for all life, just like wind forms the air we breathe. It only comes a menace when it becomes too aggressive.”
With her words a wild stalk in between us bended under her gaze, until it broke to pieces and withered. An unknown illness passed on Aurora’s face, the dark shadow of death.
“I saw this happen,” I spoke, not really knowing was it for Aurora of myself. “I saw balance tip and the worlds fall. This world has changed.”
“It has,” Aurora went tense. “The forces of human greed have entered Kaiya.”
I squinted my eyes, lightning flashing within. “So a human being is behind this? Instead of the Elements?”
Aurora had been keeping it from me. I saw her safeguard falter, fall like broken glass. “Sometimes the things we intend to be good end up causing only bad things,” her voice quivered. “Balance tips over easily. Imagine an empty c-“
“An empty cup which is filled until the point it is full, and only one droplet causes it to overflow?”
Aurora smiled. “I would have said an empty club, like you earthlings nowadays do, but as you wish.”
“It has,” Aurora went tense. “The forces of human greed have entered Kaiya.”
I squinted my eyes, lightning flashing within. “So a human being is behind this? Instead of the Elements?”
Aurora had been keeping it from me. I saw her safeguard falter, fall like broken glass. “Sometimes the things we intend to be good end up causing only bad things,” her voice quivered. “Balance tips over easily. Imagine an empty c-“
“An empty cup which is filled until the point it is full, and only one droplet causes it to overflow?”
Aurora smiled. “I would have said an empty club, like you earthlings nowadays do, but as you wish.”
“But it’s a person after all?”
Aurora’s expression was indefinable. “Trust me with this. It is better off with you in the palace of Darkness, a place you don’t belong.”
My mind bore so many questions at once they flowed from my head to my fingertips and toes, every bit of my body. Who was behind all this? Were there forces out there too vast for me to comprehend, and above all, what did they want? And if everything meant to be good ended up being something bad, what was the point in doing it?
I could tell Aurora saw how puzzled I was. She looked me in the eyes like a mother, not waiting for me to answer, not waiting for me to understand. Her words were the simplest of all, her essence as calm as steady air. Yet they were like a life preserver for me.
Aurora’s expression was indefinable. “Trust me with this. It is better off with you in the palace of Darkness, a place you don’t belong.”
My mind bore so many questions at once they flowed from my head to my fingertips and toes, every bit of my body. Who was behind all this? Were there forces out there too vast for me to comprehend, and above all, what did they want? And if everything meant to be good ended up being something bad, what was the point in doing it?
I could tell Aurora saw how puzzled I was. She looked me in the eyes like a mother, not waiting for me to answer, not waiting for me to understand. Her words were the simplest of all, her essence as calm as steady air. Yet they were like a life preserver for me.
“Always remember, that even the things that intend bad somehow end up into something good.”
In my sleep I saw the shadow of a man.
He stood on the brink of a palace built of sand. All around him the desert spread like molten butter. The air around him whirled, but no sand flew into my eyes, like I was standing behind a wall of glass.
The sand palace seemed illuminated from within; it outshone the sun, hanging dead in the sky like a frosted lamp. The wind was heavy, rippling his outlines and malforming them. Focusing on the dunes far away I instantly recognized it was no wind. In Kaiya there was no wind.
I couldn’t understand what I saw in the beginning. At first I mistook them being wind spirits, manifestations of the element. But when I could hear them out loud I knew they were something else. Because he could hear them too.
Their forms differed: they were less translucent and unlike the wind spirits, these had expressions, like they were more humane. They all glowed the same obscure shade of gold. Their speak was a mush, almost like a mixture of different tongues. Somehow he could understand them all.
“These souls are very hard to control,” he spoke.
His voice grazed my skin like a razor blade. It wasn’t particularly sharp or stern – a perfectly normal voice, almost too normal, but I tasted a familiar irritation in his tone.
“They are too attention-seeking. Cause public havoc.” The sprites danced in anticipation. “It was not a command!”
One of them spoke a language I recognized, and I leaned closer to hear what they said. There was nothing I could catch of it. The spirits reminded me of something: not really anything I had seen, more like a feeling. Souls…
As I took a dreamlike step towards them, rewinding his words in my head, the man’s figure shifted. “A spiritual stir,” he perceived, taking a slow turn. The last thing I knew was he was aware. His innate glow blocked his features, but before the dream slipped, I registered a streak of golden hair.
I awoke to the steady bleep of an electrocardiograph.
Bright light blazed into sight. Reflexively, my limbs flew awake, pointed nails scratching Severina mildly on the cheek. Pain shot all over my body, especially in the head. Almost like the circulation had frozen in my brain and pushed free so hard it made me dizzy. White spots danced in my eyes.
Severina’s dark eyes reflected mine – restless and fierce, somehow out of place. Almost like my irises had darkened, resembling a shade of copper rather than amber.
“You had a vision,” she guessed.
“I know now,” my voice trembled. I was out of breath once again, almost like I had run a marathon in my sleep. I couldn’t tell how long I had slept. After the consultation with Aurora I had warped back instantly, almost out of my will, like wind had pulled me back. I had fallen on top of the blankets, the window still open. “It’s a him.”
An intense light flashed in Severina’s eyes.
“The man in my dream – he’s behind this,” I sat up, straight as a pole, yet knowing my head hurt like hell. “He’s this guy in a sand palace on the desert, a guy with golden hair.”
Severina’s voice was tense as she shed me a look under her eyelashes. “Yes. I know him.”
My eyes flew open, shaking the last remnants of dream from them. My conversation with Aurora was stuck in my head: all the horror about the Elemental forces turning against each other and me being more safe with Severina… yet I couldn’t understand.
Severina’s voice was tense as she shed me a look under her eyelashes. “Yes. I know him.”
My eyes flew open, shaking the last remnants of dream from them. My conversation with Aurora was stuck in my head: all the horror about the Elemental forces turning against each other and me being more safe with Severina… yet I couldn’t understand.
“What kind of treaty did you form with Aurora? How did you bribe her?”
Without me really noticing, I had grabbed her shoulders and shook them hard, like trying to shake the sense out of her. Somehow her mind seemed to wonder somewhere else, like she hadn’t heard what I had said.
“Don’t you understand?” Her eyes were far away. “It’s your only choice.”
I had stopped shaking her, but my hands had started to tremble instead, like I was leading bits of the thunderstorm the night before. “How come? You can’t mean – he can’t be…”
"You have no other choice than to hide with me. If he finds about you, he will seek you and track you down. Then..." Severina paused, "When he will, he is to use you as a tool."
Without me really noticing, I had grabbed her shoulders and shook them hard, like trying to shake the sense out of her. Somehow her mind seemed to wonder somewhere else, like she hadn’t heard what I had said.
“Don’t you understand?” Her eyes were far away. “It’s your only choice.”
I had stopped shaking her, but my hands had started to tremble instead, like I was leading bits of the thunderstorm the night before. “How come? You can’t mean – he can’t be…”
"You have no other choice than to hide with me. If he finds about you, he will seek you and track you down. Then..." Severina paused, "When he will, he is to use you as a tool."
I was too much in a shock for my mind to work properly. I was frozen in place and time, not able to break free. There was nothing in the world than me and Severina then. “Who?”
Her tone was disciplined the outside, but I could see her control cracking. “My father,” she answered.
Her tone was disciplined the outside, but I could see her control cracking. “My father,” she answered.
In case I would have been holding a tea cup like I usually did, our conversation would have been accompanied by the sound of shattering porcelain. Instead I noticed I was fingering mamma’s scarf Aurora had given me before sending me away. It was her. She had been protecting me; just because what Severina’s father was up to really wasn’t the bullshit.
But what did he want from me? What did he have to do with me? And above all, why had Severina and Aurora kept it as a secret for so long?
“What is that place?” I questioned, the faint image of the bright, sandy castle still floating in my mind. “Where your father’s at.”
“It’s not a sand castle,” Severina corrected. “It’s built out of marble with flicks of gold. They glint in the sun and form an illusion of inner illumination.”
Irritation crept slowly into my mind, replacing what I had known as fear with anger. “I wasn’t asking for the architecture. Where is he? Why isn’t he with you?”
Those words seemed to break her heart. Her almost white hair, usually pulled back, flowed now on her face, covering it like a curtain of shame. Her eyes were black of guilt; voice thick from sadness. Sadness which had lasted ever since the beginning.
“It’s not a sand castle,” Severina corrected. “It’s built out of marble with flicks of gold. They glint in the sun and form an illusion of inner illumination.”
Irritation crept slowly into my mind, replacing what I had known as fear with anger. “I wasn’t asking for the architecture. Where is he? Why isn’t he with you?”
Those words seemed to break her heart. Her almost white hair, usually pulled back, flowed now on her face, covering it like a curtain of shame. Her eyes were black of guilt; voice thick from sadness. Sadness which had lasted ever since the beginning.
“Because he’s a guardian. That’s the marble palace of light. It used to be my home.”
There was a voice like breaking glass, and it all came clear to me. Balance wasn’t the way it used to be. It could be shaken only by elemental imbalance, when some element took the place of another and burned too bright. And it was all caused by human. An experiment which had began as something good but ended up turning bad…
His name haunted the corners of my mind: a name which had given me the chills ever since I heard it. What if I had guessed it all right? What if Kaiya and Earth were really twisted, and I was the only one who knew why?
Exactly that’s why he wanted to hunt me down. In case I roamed free around again, visited The Cities by free will or by accident, he would be hunting for his prey. And even my elemental-given intuition couldn’t save me from him.
The wind carried his name to my lips. Your element does not have control over you, Hilary. You communicate with it. But what if this time it was different? What if wind communicated through me, through my dreamlike visions, used me as a vessel, almost like Severina’s father – Tristen – would use me if he found me?
“How do you feel?” Severina whispered. “You turned very pale.”
My eyebrows furrowed and I let out a blow of air trying to calm myself and gather my thoughts. “I think it’s majorly easy to see. I’m not only very pale, I’m pale as hell. I just heard I’m the number-one-target of your maniac father who just happens to be the light guardian.” A balance preserver, I added in my mind, sensing this man was the autonym of it. “I feel so forsaken fantastic.”
My eyebrows furrowed and I let out a blow of air trying to calm myself and gather my thoughts. “I think it’s majorly easy to see. I’m not only very pale, I’m pale as hell. I just heard I’m the number-one-target of your maniac father who just happens to be the light guardian.” A balance preserver, I added in my mind, sensing this man was the autonym of it. “I feel so forsaken fantastic.”
“We both knew you would find it out sooner or later,” Severina said, wiping the hair off her face. Her forehead was glistening with sweat. “Your element has gifted you in unusual ways.”
“Such as the infernal dreams of destruction I see every night?”
“Visions,” she sounded like Aurora. “Prediction is a powerful elemental ability. Unlike healing, purification or even knowledge of ancient spells, it has anterograde influence.”
“Ant-what?”
“Forwards oriented,” Severina explained. “All the other elemental abilities affect somehow on the past.”
“So… that litany of stuff you just said – they were elemental abilities? Just like my foresight?”
Severina nodded. “Yes. Earth-children are very prone to healing, such as the children of water are known to be skilled in purifying such as blessings.” I instantly thought of the archives – the whole place must have been purified several times. “Darkness children-“
“Know ancient spells,” I filled in. “And thus know the other elements well. Isn’t it so?”
Severina looked into my eyes with a deep internal sigh, ignoring the question. “What did father do in the vision?”
“He seemed to be cooking some concoction out of spirits,” I raised my brows. “He was very aware of them. Almost like he sensed me there, too, though it was just a vision. It happens in the future. Is that what he can do? He can sense draws like Chyse?”
Severina shook her head helplessly, and I knew something worse was coming. A frown was stuck on her face, all joy drained out of her. What kind of father treated her daughter like that?
“He senses stirs in the Spirit realm,” she said. “That’s why he sensed you. In your visions you are a spirit,” after all, my body lay asleep there, “Thus father bears a dangerous ability. When used right and wrong. Your vision is external, as I thought.”
“Such as the infernal dreams of destruction I see every night?”
“Visions,” she sounded like Aurora. “Prediction is a powerful elemental ability. Unlike healing, purification or even knowledge of ancient spells, it has anterograde influence.”
“Ant-what?”
“Forwards oriented,” Severina explained. “All the other elemental abilities affect somehow on the past.”
“So… that litany of stuff you just said – they were elemental abilities? Just like my foresight?”
Severina nodded. “Yes. Earth-children are very prone to healing, such as the children of water are known to be skilled in purifying such as blessings.” I instantly thought of the archives – the whole place must have been purified several times. “Darkness children-“
“Know ancient spells,” I filled in. “And thus know the other elements well. Isn’t it so?”
Severina looked into my eyes with a deep internal sigh, ignoring the question. “What did father do in the vision?”
“He seemed to be cooking some concoction out of spirits,” I raised my brows. “He was very aware of them. Almost like he sensed me there, too, though it was just a vision. It happens in the future. Is that what he can do? He can sense draws like Chyse?”
Severina shook her head helplessly, and I knew something worse was coming. A frown was stuck on her face, all joy drained out of her. What kind of father treated her daughter like that?
“He senses stirs in the Spirit realm,” she said. “That’s why he sensed you. In your visions you are a spirit,” after all, my body lay asleep there, “Thus father bears a dangerous ability. When used right and wrong. Your vision is external, as I thought.”
“So it’s not about foresight at all?”
“No. Just like every strong elemental ability, vision is rare. Many never master it. It is usually an ability born into. Depending on one’s persona it can be internal or external. Internal visions are controllable and come from within. External visions come from the outer world – usually from the effect of an element. They both are equally useful. When the target is clear, internal vision is like a golden key, but if there is no lock, what is it of use? It is all the same with external vision. It gives parts of information, like hidden puzzle pieces, and unless the ability to put it back together they are useless.”
“Mein Gott,” I snickered almost ironically – ironically due it was completely the wrong situation. “You sound exactly like Aurora.”
“No. Just like every strong elemental ability, vision is rare. Many never master it. It is usually an ability born into. Depending on one’s persona it can be internal or external. Internal visions are controllable and come from within. External visions come from the outer world – usually from the effect of an element. They both are equally useful. When the target is clear, internal vision is like a golden key, but if there is no lock, what is it of use? It is all the same with external vision. It gives parts of information, like hidden puzzle pieces, and unless the ability to put it back together they are useless.”
“Mein Gott,” I snickered almost ironically – ironically due it was completely the wrong situation. “You sound exactly like Aurora.”
“In one way or another, we guardians are all the same,” she sighed. “There are habits we never manage to abandon.”
Inside my mind a thunderstorm roared. Every time a new neural connection formed, there was a snap and a flash, and for a swift second all was clear and bright. The steady rumble of thunder shook my eardrums, the sound my memories made while escaping my mind. I was losing myself to someone I didn’t know, plunging carelessly into the world of secrecy and lies, good and evil.
I felt exactly like I did during math class after solving a difficult equation: successful and relieved. But there was a new dimension to the joy, a new unfamiliar feeling I had only tasted in the form of danger.
Uncontrollable, ceaseless fear.
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